Thursday, January 22, 2009

When I'm outside I enjoy . . .

The best part of my writing is my last three sentences .

What I need to work on is my middle paragraph.

When I am Outside I

Enjoy . . .

When I’m outside an activity I enjoy is swinging.

I like swinging because I feel like I’m flying. I love the air blowing in my face. I love the scenery. I can swing really high.

I love the air blowing in my face. I love the air because it cools me off. When I‘m cooled off I am not angry. I like swinging because when the air blows in my face it makes my hair fly out of my face. When my hair is out of my face I can see a lot better.

I love the scenery. I love the blue sky, yellow sun, green grass, light brown sand. White fluffy clouds, white birds and geese. I like the geese

Because sometimes they can be really quiet. I like the scenery because I love all of the beautiful colors.

I can swing really high. When I swing high I feel free. I feel free because when the air hits me in the face I feel free. It gives me excitement. It gives me excitement because I feel free.

Now you know my favorite activity when I’m outside. In case you forgot, my favorite activity is swinging. Now what’s your favorite activity?

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hi Hailie - I really enjoyed your description of swinging. I think you captured the whole feeling of it. Reading your story made me feel liked I'd taken a little break from my desk and gone outside.
From Mr. Lewis' Wife

Haley said...

I injoy swimming to.But I don't feel like I am flying!

MsJackson said...

Haili,
I really like the way your writing turned out! I can feel the way you feel when you are swinging. Good job!

Ms. Jackson