Friday, September 21, 2007

Funny story by Tavi

What I like about my writing is the part where I screamed like a girl. If I did it over again I would work on spelling and writing. Overall I feel really good about my story. (scribed by Mr. Lewis.)

3 comments:

Jeff Lewis said...

Tavi, your story is very funny, and even funnier when you tell it. Don't forget that we improved this story by having you tell it out loud and recording it... then writing it down. You have a very good voice. Your spelling is really improving too.

hector m said...

tavi i like that story because all of yous went in back of the van and i didnt realy get how you got scared but it was fuuny

Joseph Miller said...

Tavi,

I would love to hear you tell this story. It sounds like it is very fun. I really liked the details that you added to the story it created a better picture for me. For example, when you said it was cold and there were deer. That help me imagine the countryside in Wisconsin, not the city. I think the story could be even better if you explained why you went to the back of the van. Did something catch your attention? A sound? A sight? Were you so scared that your hands were shaking?

Great Job!